it's lovee;

.Friday, December 31, 2010 ' 3:31 AM Y

2010? 2011?

Someday, somewhere,somehow,someone.

It's the last day of 2010.i spent this day with my u4f8. went to airport & had lerk thai for lunch. as i cant really bite, so i just ordered a tomyam soup & rice, its quite nice actually. before we start, debbie gave us a card & let us write to ourselves in 10years time. i kinda of forget what i wrote, but i didnt write alot though. & after lunch we start to exchange christmas gifts. i've got cherie's one, a set of mickey mouse earpiece, it's useful & i've never seen this before. coool. as we ate alot & was freaking full, we went around the WHOLE airport & tried to digest. we went to T1 & T2 for starbucks. but in the end only liting & yeong bought, the rest went to Mc Cafe & have a drink. as usual, we sit in one circle & start chatting what happened last time & this year. i miss talking to them like that, so memorable. went home at 5plus with johnny debbie & huiling. when i reached home, i start sneezing like nobody's business. my house is like colder than outside. & i have some report to do later. this is how i spend my last day of 2010.

i know he's coming back tonight. i actually checked what flight he's taking & around what time he will land. apparently, i dont know anything. i really feel like slapping myself, i'm actually expecting & hoping that he'll call or give me a text when he landed. he dont have any obligations to do so. what am i expecting for? what am i hoping for? i'm expecting something out of nothing again. this mistake have been repeating since a few thousand days ago. but i dont know how to stop it,seriously. Perhaps debbie's right : 'just dont expect lah.' just tell me how to do it & i'll follow your instructions. this is really tiring. i cant stop thinking of him during random times. & when i think of him, i will just beat myself on my lap or palm, to stop me from thinking. i hope i dont get any bruises for doing that. there was once somebody who told me this, " eh walao, my girlf& her friends watching horror, i dont know whether want to go or not!" "just go lor, if you're not scared~" " of course i scared lah! horror leh!" "then dont go lah!" "but my girlf also scared what!" get the point? my friend is scared of horror, but despite of being scared, my friend still want to go & protect the girlf. would someone even do this for me? debbie was asking me, will we have our another half next christmas? for me? i doubt so.

New Year Reflection:
1)this year pass like the speed of light.
2)went to a new school without u4f8 around me.
3)lucky enough to know good people & friends.
4)who says poly can slack like pig?
5)glad to be closer to u4f8 despite we're at different school ; separation make us closer.
6)i went crazy over kpop.
7)changed class in a new semester with another 4 girls.
8)know new people again.
9)someone stepped into my life & screwed up my year-end.
10)i never feel like this before.
11)went to Taiwan & had fun. spent lot of money.
12)thought i could forget him, & it failed.
13)i finally know what is 有些爱越想抽离却越更清晰;最痛的距离是你不在身边,却在我的心里

New Year Resolution
1)change my temper,not getting agitated that easily.
2)save more money.
3)grow taller & prettier.
4)meet more nice people.
5)u4f8 & babydolls to be happy.
6)be stronger & confident than ever.
7)improve in studies & not get distracted by anything
8)concentrate on studies & not anything else.
9)able to harden my heart & not to fall in love again.
10)be a bitch that not caring others' opinions.
11)not falling into any trap anymore.
12)slap guys who let me have second thoughts & give me mixed signals w/o telling me what they're thinking.
13)sleep earlier than 12midnight.
14)not having butterflies in my tummy & anyone in mind.
15)not gonna get attach to anyone anymore.
16)believe only in myself ; not believing that 11:11 wishes & prayers or even miracles would work on me.
17)accept something that i couldnt change.
18)No expectations, no disappointments.
19)not gonna expect something out of nothing.
20)just dont fall in love...

loved